My Husband is a STUD

DH has fulfilled my dearest wish. I will be taking a hot shower very, very soon.

The Movies in 15 Minutes version of the remainder of our Home Depot installation saga:

ACT I

I don't feel like synopsizing our earlier trauma again. Read this instead.

ACT II

Friday evening. Chez mimi is on Day Three of the Hot Water Watch.
HD Installer: I'm not touching that thing; it has an energy management box.
DH: But you can't just leave without...
(HD Installer leaves skid marks backing out of our driveway)
DH: (on phone with sap from HD Installation Services) Do I get a water heater tonight or not?
Sap from HD Installation Services: No. We're still getting out of the clown car.
DH: Refund all the money. Fix your screwed up system so some poor 80-year-old grandmother with a busted water heater doesn't have the same problems we have. (righteous phone receiver slamming)
mimi: (impressed by DH's care for helpless old ladies, but still miffed at the water situation) Crap. This means no hot shower tomorrow morning.

ACT III

Saturday dawns.
DH: Off to Lowe's to buy a water heater.
Lowe's Salesman: Don't spend that much money. I'm an ex-plumber. Buy this one and all this junk to put it in with.
(DH refrains from kissing salesman on mouth; saves $200 and brings home water heater in a box and junk to put it in with, like valves, hoses, and Teflon tape.)
mimi: How long till hot water?
DH: Hold your tongue, woman. (goes to driving range)
mimi: Argh!! (goes to paint hallway)
DH: (back from driving range) Screw, screw, tape, tape, fix, fix, open valve.
Angels: (singing) Hallelujah!!
DH: I am man. I have pipe wrench. I fix water heater. Feed me!
mimi: Hey, for hot water, you'll get a lot more than a steak.

THE END

Okay, off to live up to my innuendo...