Night Owl

I should be in bed right now. I have to be at school at an ungodly early hour of the morning, and it's nearly one a.m. No sleep in sight for me.

I just finished reading Empire Falls by Richard Russo, the latest choice of the book club I belong to. Good read overall, but the eternal Pollyanna in me has to wonder why modern fiction seems to require a traumatic/depressing ending, especially if it is to win a prize? (Empire Falls won the Pulitzer in 2002.) Are happy endings that reviled in literary circles? Are we not to be happy, but only satisfied or aware of our shortcomings?

I have enough to deal with in my life right now, what with my stressful job, lack of creativity at the moment, money troubles (DH's car needs fixing to the tune of $1,600, three-quarters of what it's worth), kids who need dental work I also can't pay for easily, church drama, and my house's perpetual state of disarray. At times like these, I say "Bring on the romance novels! Pitch me some chick lit!" Hell, bring on any novel in which people manage to bump through life without having to scale the emotional heights of abuse, betrayal, or violence. Is that so wrong? Does that make me an intellectual lightweight even though I love to read Austen and Faulkner?

These are the kinds of things that keep the squirrels on the wheel and me out of bed. I don't like them much, but there they are. At least I had a good idea for a book while taking my shower this morning, but right on the heels of that developing idea was the crushing thought of, "So what happens to the book you've already got planned? Never going to get it done? Let it twist in the wind, unfinished, like so much else in your immediate circle of concern?"

Gah!

Yep, enough to drive you a little crazy, those damned squirrels. Too bad they're not the kind you can silence by leaping out of bed and scrawling a reminder note for yourself on the bathroom counter. What I wouldn't give for a week's vacation and a mildly successful Fantasy Five ticket right now. Guess I'll have to settle with my mom's five-step plan. According to mom (and keep in mind this was a four-step plan until I turned 21), there is nothing in the world that cannot be fixed or improved by means of:

1. A hot meal
2. A hot bath
3. A good night's sleep
4. Brushing your teeth
5. A good screw

I'll tackle the Crest first, then hit the sack. Who knows? I might be able to swing step five before breakfast, if I don't whack the snooze alarm too many times. Five am's going to come awfully soon...